Patiently Waiting

Since the news of our baby's diagnosis I feel even more anxious to meet our bundle of joy. Part of it is not looking forward to labor, and just getting it over with. Another is just wanting the surgery/nicu stay to be done and have our baby home, and the other part just wanting to be home in Tx getting into a grove. With thinking of those few things comes all the stuff before it that can easily put me into a state of depression. I am have been praying daily for the Lord's strength and joy to keep enduring. I hear so many positive stories and that helps leaps and bounds.
However, being the OCD freak that I am is still not helping. I keep thinking of how different it's going to be to live at home for 2 months plus(should I able to deliver in WI.)
Ya'lI I moved out at 18 and went back for a few months at the age of 20 when I got out of basic training...so it's been a while. Oh mom and dad I love you to death but you know how it is to sleep in your own bed, drink out of your favorite cup of coffee and shower with your shampoo and conditioner. Double snap, all these negatives need to be erased and I need to thank God for his plan of taking care of me and my baby. I was watching Joyce Meyer's this morning and she was talking about how selfish we as humans and Christians can be. So I am taking that selfish attitude and checking it, trying to check it at the door. I mean really, are those 'things' going to get me feeling sorry for myself? Positive note: I (we) get to eat all my mommy's yummy home made meals, be at the dinner table again with my little brother and sisters, Isabelle gets to enjoy a Midwest summer, maybe a trip to the WI Dells, State Fair Park and all it's glory, church on Sundays, all delightful.
So poof, be gone...I am thinking positive. It doesn't help waiting on Dr's and insurance to be told what our next step is. Can we just get it done now please? I don't want to keep driving down town and waiting 45 minutes to get an ultra sound or see the Dr.
Nope, life doesn't work that way.
You think Isabelle wants to trade spots with me? Maybe I can run around in my pj's all morning and eat my yogurt with my fingers? Ha, that'd be to easy.
Instead I am now training my mind to think of how much my little girl is going to be loved on by her family this summer. (Lord willing we get up to WI.) That she'll enjoy wagon rides to the park, learn goofy things from her uncle and aunts. Help her grandma's cook in the kitchen and squish the ant hills outside. All the fun things a 2 year old should be doing; which she doesn't always get to do (w/ the fam) being that we are so far away.

God is good and he's providing for us in each and every step of this journey we are on. Can I get an AMEN?
Praying for more answers at our Dr appointments today and am excited for yet another ultrasound of our sweet, sweet baby.

Here are some pics from last summer on our family vacation.





she got to see lots of frogs last summer. :)



helpin great grandma put her shoes on, and then wearing them herself.

Happy Thursday

Daddy's little helper.


Super tent.


'Feeding her baby' she says (A lil Kix cereal never hurt, right?)


Riding in style.


She was ready to run errands.


Daddy's little girl.

'IZ-ems'

A new list of words (from Isabelle) that is sure to make you laugh :)

ah-lishis!!! = Delicious (My favorite word, always said with such enthusiasm)
disgus-ah-ning = Disgusting
pong-ob = Spongebob
'What the' = this phrase is said way too much. enough said.
peas = please
light-a-min = vitamin (she asks for her lightamin's every day, 10 X's a day!)
ah-pposite = applesauce
welcome = your welcome
mote-ah-cycle = motorcycle
seepy = sleepy
rocking roll = rock n roll (courtesy of aunty Sara)
laxing = relaxing ("mom lax!" is what I get told during movie time)
are-lee web = Charlotte's Web
toe white = Snow White
und-ee wear = underwear
handy manny = handy mandy
cook-en-ing = cooking
gate-er-gade = Gatorade (Jake's favorite)

Over all, Isabelle has very good pronunciation. I am thankful she can say her r's and s's...or doesn't talk with a lisp. It seems at this age half of her words or phrases are her own slang. Sure is funny hearing her say some of it, pretty soon all these 'IZ-ems' will fade away and she'll be teaching her little brother or sister how to say these words.

Don't grow too fast sweet Isabelle!

Enjoy your weekend Ya'll!

Puprle Bubble Baths

Don't you love colored bath water? (When it's NOT yellow!)

Spring is here

Its been an eventful week all ready and it's only Tuesday.
Isabelle has been such a riot these last few days...if only I had a camcorder going 24/7.
We got another ultrasound for our little baby yesterday which was great.It is the one we have been waiting almost 2 weeks for. We have more answers and will get even more this Thursday. It is a lot to process and to take in, this diagnosis. I have read so much on Spina Bifida these last 24 hours it's outrageous. Jake and I have a list of questions going and we should get the majority of them answered this Thursday. I have done a lot of crying, but it's a good thing to get it out.
As always, we are trusting in God to carry us through this emotional world wind and to just have his healing hands on our baby. So far the diagnosis isn't what we as parents want to hear, but our little one will not have any paralysis and should be able to function just fine. I will be having many more ultrasounds in the months to come to monitor the baby and make sure nothing is worsening.
I will share more of the diagnosis as we get more information.

A lot of thanks to our family and friends who have been praying for baby, Jake and I, and all the cards sent. Thank you!
Luckily I can call my mom whenever and she answers, Jake is in the field training during the week and I can't just pick up the phone and call him. So thanks Mom for answering your cellular and Skype calls. :)
Also for my girlfriends here in El Paso who are my support system here. They have kept Isabelle and I busy and are here to watch her when we have our LONG days between Dr's and hospitals and specialists. Aimee and Liz I'd be at my wits end with out you two!
So thank you everyone for your prayers and just being there to listen.

On a lighter note, we are getting my desk I ordered on Overstock.com. I have heard good things about that site, so we'll see how it goes. Waiting for our new coffee table for living room, and loving my new chandelier in my kitchen!
Our little Easter egg deco is up in a few windows and Isabelle have sun tanned skin all ready.
Isabelle and I have been having fun making batches of home made cookies; peanut butter chip and butterscotch oatmeal. YUM.
Oh and potty training is going fabulous. She goes every day and her diapers, when she does where them are pretty dry...we have been going out on errands and to park in her underwear's and she has only had one accident! Yay Isabelle!

Happy Tuesday Ya'll

Spring cleaning and Sunshine

It sure doesn't feel like spring this week! It is warm, 80's all week. Isabelle and I's farmer tan has started thanks to our walk and park excursions.
Since last Saturday we have been out and about every day, Isabelle taking over 3 hour naps and me snoozing too. Love it!
Today we picked out a little kiddie pool for the Iz monster and I cleaned ALL 3 car seats, a stroller, and car. I am pooped. This weekend I am going to start sorting Isabelle's baby items and see what can be used for baby...bought some new totes because more of Isabelle's clothes are piling in the spare room! Children grow so fast. Half her wardrobe will be tote'd up by this weekend...again! I feel like every 2 months or so she gets a new wardrobe...must be nice. :)



Check out Isabelle's styling shades on Patty's Day.










Sunday we ventured out to the PX on post and enjoyed watching Isabelle play. Lately she's been in to wearing tank tops. So I found a few and pulled them out for this nice weather we've been enjoying.
Oh and her sandals I found last summer for only 3 bucks at Target!









































Why she is on the coffee table is beyond me. But she stayed on there and played for almost 20 minutes.

Happy St Patricks Day!

So today I am thinking of our past St Patty's days...In 2007 we celebrated St Patty's Day on Jake's R n R (1st tour.) We had such a blast!

Then two years later, who would have thought Jake would be on his 2nd tour! It was Isabelle and I :)

Later we will enjoy some corn beef sandwiches and home made potatoes chips. Yum
I will watch while Jake and his buddies drink green beer.

God allready knew

Last week Thursday we found out our little baby to be has Spinal Bifida.
But, God all ready knew.

Our hearts were broken as thoughts of fear, panick, and heartbreak set in.
But, God all ready knew.

Since then, it has brought my husband and I closer together and made us love our baby even more, and God all ready knew!

God all ready knows what tomorrow will bring, and what our next ultra sound will tell us. So we are thankful for today, for tomorrow, and what else God has in store for our family. Jake and I are truly believing in God to heal our baby and that the outcome be as minimal as possible.
We will go to bed with prayers for you little baby, because we love you no matter what and God does too! He all ready has a plan for us and is only going to give us what we can handle.
At 20 weeks now I am half way through this pregnancy and can not wait to meet our little girl or boy.

DIY shelves...and some hair pulling.

These shelves were a lot harder for me than they should have been. However, now that I have made them, I could do it a lot easier a second time around. I wanted to throw these darn things away about half way through building them, but stuck it out. They are nice and inexpensive shelves; I am thinking of making one long one as a book shelf for Isabelle's room and the baby's Nursery.
I have been crackling some of my picture frames to give my sitting room a country look.
I also got the idea to take a few items my late grandpa had given me. An old money bag from a bank in Milwaukee (our home town) and 2 Miller high life bottle openers. Jake loves old Miller and PBR things so it seemed cool to put them in an old frame. The 'new' frames sit on my shelves.

I am proud to announce the kid's bathroom is complete! Minus a blue vase I am still looking for to put on the shelf, it is d-o-n-e. I found a mirror I liked at Lowe's, finally a shower curtain at Target, and with an accent wall painted chocolate...
TA-DA!






















Oh and Isabelle telling me to 'stay out' while she 'helped' Jake install the cabinet hardware.

































I found this defuser at pier 1 for 2.98 and this cute little glass bird (q-tip holder) at World Market! Love them.

Childhood Memories both Past and Present

Lately I have been remembering little things/events from my child hood that still bring a smile to my face. As Isabelle gets older and her world is expanding and all about exploring, memories from my childhood come to mind.
Remember how children aspirin or vitamins used to have that big cotton ball inside? My mother used to tell us it was a from a kitty cat. My brother and I used to giggle waiting for the next time mom opened a new bottle of whatever that would have that soft 'kitten fur' in it. Silly isn't it? I opened my new bottle of prenatal's and told Isabelle the same, her response was price less! Big bug eyes and a squeal as she pulled out the 'kitty kitty' (in her words.')
I can also remember being found in my mothers closet trying on her high heels and jewelry. My mother was a fashionable momma! She still managed to wear heels and pretty dresses; NOT grandma skirts and blouses like some moms where. Blaaa. :)
I remember her clothes smelling like White Shoulders and opening up her red velvet lined jewelery box. Even though I knew what I would find, it was still exciting to touch the cool, gold jewelry. I would pretend I was getting ready for church like she would. I thought I was so special (and still do) that I have the same birthstone as her, ruby red. Just the sound of rubies still makes me smile, like we are queens or something.
I remember sitting on our front porch with my brother watching the other mom's come home from work with their kids. Wondering what it was like to be in a day care or at grandma's all day. Sometimes I thought I was missing out on some cool thing but as I got older I realized how much fun we had at home. The walks and bike rides in the summer, finding rummages sales and getting change or dollar to spend all on something I wanted! The snow days outside for hours till my fingers were numb; then called in for hot chocolate. Man those were some good days! I dream of those days with my mom, my little brother(s) and sister(s). I am so grateful to be able to make these memories with our children. I have been having dreams of walking my two little ones in my double jogger, and feeding the baby while I read a book to Isabelle. It is sometimes scary to think that I am their role model. They will listen and mimic all I do and say. Pretty scary and cool.
We were poor growing up, but our needs were always met. We could have had the mom that worked so we had that little bit of extra cash for the bigger vacations, nicer furniture, and cooler clothes. BUT, I would not have the memories, values, or the learning experiences that I got from my mother, whose SAHM mother taught her. (Thank you Jacob for your job, your hard work, and your sacrifice of not having the greatest job. Thank you for understanding the importance/need of our children having mom all day.) These are the things that I hope our children will see and understand while growing up. I hope my Isabelle and (baby #2, 3, or 4...) will relish in the same memories I had.
Isabelle is constantly keeping me busy. From coloring faces on her balloons and pretending they are her pets, to hours of side walk chalk coloring. She helps me bake and helps me clean. She comes out of my closet in my bracelets and flip flops. She unfolds the clothes I folded thinking she's helped 'refold' them. I tell ya, 2 year olds huh? From the random hugs and squeezes to the joy I see on her face when she's accomplished something new. Things like zipping up her jacket, going tinkle on the potty, or getting dressed herself. I don't know how I would deal with missing these moments or only having them on the weekends. There will be a time I work again, but not while our kids are young and impressionable.

making trail mix.

I recently heard of an unfortunate story that happened somewhere here in Texas. A daycare provider's home had a grease fire; 4 out of the 6 children were burned to death. One of the mother's when arriving to the hospital asked if her little girl was one of the children who died. The doctor showed her a pair of burnt pants asking if they belonged to her little girl, she nodded yes. It was this mothers first day back at work, her daughter's first day in day care and this horrible tragedy took place. Now I know there are lots of ways to go, but I know that that is one thing I won't ever have to worry about.
I am cherishing the memories Isabelle and I have this spring and summer before our 2nd bundle of joy arrives and the memories are then shared. I can't wait for Isabelle to see her new little play mate, friend, and sibling.

Thank you Lord for our days together...Enjoy your weekend all!

P.S. Homemade apple fritters for breakfast this morning! Found here....
http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2010/03/apple-fritters/