Where to start?

The last 48 hours have been emotional. Sunday night we said goodbye to Jake. My heart just ached as I watched him walk away from my rear view mirror. Every part of me straining to hold on and to get my last look of him. You never know if its the last time you will see your Soldier when they go off to war. My husband, my better half, my night in shining armor, the father of my children. It literally took my breath away. I could taste his big red on my lips for a moment and the tears fell. I gave into that moment of fear. And as quickly as those negative thoughts came in I had to let them go. For I know my God will protect him, and I have such peace in that. My heart is aching for my husband, but this is our life, his job, to go and fight the bad guys.
We are so fortunate to have him gone just 3 months. It could have been the whole 9! To think if he would have left when the other soldiers did there wouldn't be a number 3 on the way.
I was surrounded by my fellow Army wives this morning. I felt their love, understanding, and prayers, and I was once again comforted, so humbled that I have such women in my life. As much as I want to be home and sit by my dad like a little girl, and cry, I know here at Fort Campbell is where I am meant to be. Where my girls are busy with their normal day to day routine, their friends, and their home.
My husband can leave knowing we are safe and have a good support system. I can't imagine what he is going through. I mean sure he shares his feelings with me. But as a man, a father, a husband, their every being is made to protect to build up, to guard. And he has to let that go, he has no control over there. But we have the man upstairs! Jake and I have come a long way and thank goodness we are at a good place with our walk with God. Jake gave me a list of bible verses to read throughout this deployment and Isaiah 41:13 has stuck with me. "For I am The Lord your God,who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'do not fear; I will help you"
The girls are keeping me smiling, right now I need them as much as they need me. Funny how that works...we are already in a routine. I am soaking up this time with them. These last few months before our lives change again and we have another baby Gehl!
My dad and I were talking last night and he told me he went to his weekly bible study. He was running late and when he walked in and joined the others who were already praying he told me how humbled he was at what he heard. 4 different people went on to pray over Jake and I. To pray for our household, our marriage, our children, his job. My father was choked up hearing his brothers and sisters in Christ praying over his son n law and daughter. It was so good to hear that, so reassuring, these prayers, I'm sure along with others, have really carried Jake and I through these first few days and will continue to. So thank you!

It's time to sneak away and nap now while my little chicks are napping...have a good Tuesday!

And give your husband an extra long kiss tonight-cause I sure wish I could do that to mine. :)